Parent Tips

I don’t know about you, but I feel that not only has everything completely changed for my family since March, it just seems to be getting worse. Is money a concern? Will the kids go back to school in September? And if they do, what will that look like? Desks 6 feet apart, lunch in classrooms, masks all day? Will we be dealing with the hassles of online schooling? Will we be trying to find a way to juggle careers and homeschooling at the same time? There is still so much unknown. That creates a lot of stress for parents and, believe it or not, children too. Little minds can actually be filled with big worries, and it’s our job to try to help ease their minds whenever we can. One thing that I do know is that any type of plan can change over and over again between now and the first day of school. The only thing we can do as parents is to try to be prepared to help make all of this as painless as possible. Here are some tips and ideas to help you navigate through this crazy time with your children:

1. Have big conversations away from little ears

This one might seem obvious, but you would be amazed at what your children are listening to when you don’t realize it. Save the conversations with your spouse and other adults concerning back-to-school procedures and anything about COVID-19

for when you are sure they aren’t listening. All of this is hard and upsetting, I get it. However, knowing that you are upset only makes it worse for them.

2. Be honest and willing to talk

I just said save the conversations for when they aren’t listening, but that goes out the window when the kids start asking questions. Don’t deflect them or stretch the truth. If they are thinking enough to ask you for information, they deserve an honest answer. You don’t have to go into deep detail and when you don’t have an answer, it’s OK to say that. You are human and it is totally acceptable to say, “I don’t know.” A good idea is to follow up an “I don’t know” with a “When I do know, I will tell you.”

3. Be supportive

Let your children know it’s OK to have feelings about all of this; as parents, we surely do! They have a right to be angry, sad and feel lonely at times. Give them a chance to express how they are feeling and help them talk through it. Remind them that we are all in this together and that you are there for them in every way.

4. Make masks fun!

While I wish this wasn’t the case, I don’t think that masks are going away anytime soon. Most likely, kids will be wearing them to school, and we will all be wearing them inside public places for a while. Fortunately, there are so many cute masks to choose from. Let kids pick out their own. In this house, we have shark masks, pretty patterns, colors to match each outfit and so on. Treat them as a fashion accessory because, after all, they kind of are now, right? A lot of local businesses are selling them in stores, so kids can check them out for themselves before you buy them. It’s a good idea to have your kids wear them off and on so they get used to them. It will help ease the transition come September.

5. Teach them the COVID-19 rules

Make sure they are washing their hands, wearing their masks and staying a safe distance apart from others. If these behaviors become second nature to them, it will make going back to school a lot easier.

6. One-on-one time

Use this time of social distancing to your advantage and spend some quality alone time with your children. Not everything is open, but you can have fun being creative. Go on a scavenger hunt in your neighborhood, take a nature walk, go to a beach you’ve never been to before, order some arts-and-crafts activities from a local business that you can pick up curbside together when the weather won’t cooperate. The possibilities are endless!

7. Stay positive!

It’s easy to feel down about a lot of things right now, making this a great time to set an example for your children on how to think positive. Help them find the good in other people. Celebrate the essential workers. Bake cookies for the nurses at a local hospital. Paint shells or rocks and place them on your neighbor’s lawn for them to find. If you know someone who is sick, make them a meal or FaceTime them for some social interaction. There are so many things you can have your kids do to have them feeling good about themselves and others!

8. Establish a routine

One thing that has been very difficult to maintain is structure and routines around the house. Some days in the midst of conference calls, barking dogs, screaming kids and dinner waiting to be cooked, you are just counting the minutes until bedtime. Whether school is at home, online, or both, start a routine early to help the kids begin to transition back into learning. Have them wake up at a decent time each day (and go to bed at a decent time too, of course); set aside certain times for schoolwork and certain times for play; start cutting down the screen time (we are all guilty, no judgment here); have them read before bed, etc. What works for you can be totally different for someone else. Find a routine that works for your family and stick with it. Children function better when they know what to expect. For example, if they know that they have to finish their work before they can watch TikTok, they will be more motivated and eager to get it done.

9. Keep them safe online

Kids are spending more time online these days. Transitioning to online learning just increased that time. Have parental controls on their laptops, iPads, phones, etc. Make sure you know what they are watching and who they are talking to. We live in a scary world and I feel that you should take advantage of every way you can protect your children. We have all of our children’s electronics set up so that when one of our kids wants to purchase an app, or something within an app, a notification is sent to me first and I have to approve it. This has been an amazing feature. I can read about a game before my children play it and, of course, this also gives me the chance to say no, this isn’t appropriate for you right now.

10. Turn off the electronics

An hour before bedtime, take the electronics away. Charge them in a different room of the house, just not their bedrooms. Studies show that the blue lights from electronics keep us up later and disturb our sleep patterns. Kids need their sleep. By taking them away at night, you avoid notifications disturbing them during the night or waking them up in the morning.

All we can do right now is take it one day at a time. Sometimes thinking a month or two or even weeks ahead is just too much. Since things keep changing daily, just take each day as it comes. Maybe when this is all over, we will be hugging a little tighter, appreciating each other a little bit more and enjoying the little things. After all, it’s the little things that matter the most!